New Year Musings

Last night was simple but sweet.  After riding Bart to the city with my daughter and meeting my partner in Union Square, in San Francisco, we visited the tree, the village scene at the Hilton, walked up to Chinatown, and had dinner at Kan's. By the end of our evening in the city, my daughter crumbled as we walked back to the car, and was snoring within minutes of driving home. I have to say, I had never seen so many women dressed in 3" to 4" spiked heels, and above-the-knee, lightweight, halter dresses at this time of year. I, who cannot stand to be the slightest of cold, dressed in five layers, two sets of tights, a hat, and my Z coils. I was glad about it.

I thought I would just go to bed when we got home but then thought better of it. I thought, no, even though I won't make it until midnight, ritual is important to me. And for the last several years, we have burned papers filled with what we want to let go of and posted what we want to bring in on the bulletin board, although this year it will go on my altar. Then we had a few little snacks, with some port and tea.  Then said good night.

This will be a wonderful year, with much to look forward to.  I hope to have my book completed this year, the completion of at least a ten-year project. I hope to do many readings in book groups, salons, poetry open mikes, etc.  I want to strengthen my relationship with my partner, my daughter and friends, and my Buddhist practice. I want to bring forth what I am to be.

And in regards to beauty.  Beauty in all its manifestations is vital to me, the expression of it is essential, and this has not changed. My ideas about Beauty are changing, and how mainstream they are, I don't know, they may be different than even my friends and colleagues.  But the idea that I could be wearing what I was comfortable in and feeling completely unique in the expression, I don't know, somehow, I felt confident, and like I had arrived in my own life.

Now, I want to give back.

And how I will do that is through my writing.

Posted on January 1, 2008 .